I spy a salacious sight...

I will whet your lecherous appetite with a naughty post. Readers mine, siphon this message into the ears of my love. Admirers mine, hold in your hand your most beloved possession and shake it hither und thither. Lovers mine, empty out your wallets for another lap-dance, I say.

Gather round, gather round. The object is round, the subject is long, a mating occurs between the two, one lascivious, the other scared scared. Entrez dedans! Si si, comme ça... avec le ç d'un caleçon.

Ah, desire! Wiggle your toes and jiggle your feet. It comes, from head to toe, a current... the night's still young. It'll recur. Yes, it will, my dame. Yes, it will, madame. Slowly, avec gentillesse, suavemente. Ouais, I think you've got the hang of it.