Une lettre à mon amant

Mon cheri,

I've blamed you for all you've done, I've detested you for your fickleness, and yet everytime to me you've come, I've let you in without restraint. You feel not the way I do, for you have done some wrongs unto me, by my expectations, maybe not by yours.

And now the time has come to say goodbye, for I would not had I stayed but I fly away, yet again, the pattern that repeats in my life. I meet you now, not to hold you once again but to end this - whatever it was - on good terms. You didn't measure up to what I wanted you to be and you came to me only to fulfill your needs. But hey, you never promised me any more and here I was, enacting a romantic night in a french restaurant with portuguese music and wine. It was my folly that I've now realized that though I cut the cord between us, I wish to see you again comme un ami. You weren't what I'd wanted but you gave me hope, a shining glimpse at what may have been. I hope you will remember how we were but who knows. After all, you are like all of them. Again, you never promised not to be. It was all me, me, me.

Goodbye. With me I take this gift of tender memories, of you and I, in bed, where you gave all, by holding my hand through the night and everytime we let go, you grasped it again with the same vigour with your heated palm. Adieu.